


Not All Who Wander

by gretchenk0720



Category: Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon, Sam Heughan - Fandom, Scottish Actor RPF
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Rebuilding, Romance, Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-01
Updated: 2015-08-16
Packaged: 2018-03-09 22:34:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,237
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3266870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gretchenk0720/pseuds/gretchenk0720
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eowyn “Wyn” Murray has devoted all her time to University and work, to hide the pain of a horrific accident three years ago. With little time for fun or a personal life, will Wyn break her own rules an follow her heart?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Being mindful of the uneven ancient cobblestones beneath her feet, Wyn Murray hurriedly turned the corner of Old Dumbarton near the city center of Glasgow, Scotland. She was late. An odd occurrence, yet one that didn’t need to happen today. Skidding to a stop as she turned down the alley to the back door of Duke’s bar, she opened it and braced herself for the possible tongue lashing from her boss. Joe was simplistic, and hardly ever chided the girl. She worked hard and was the most requested of his waitresses, but tonight was different; a private party. Albeit on her usual night off, but she graciously volunteered when he asked.

“Èowyn…” he sang in a mocking voice, an assurance that he was far from angry.

She winced at the full use of her name; there were only certain people that she allowed to use it, and her boss was one of them, “Sorry Joe, Literary Theory put me down for the count. I slept through my alarm,” she replied.

He winked at the girl, “I can’t even be mad at ye lass because I know I won’t have ye forever. I’m just glad you’re here.” He handed Wyn a glass of water as she tucked in her shirt and pulled her strawberry blonde hair back into a ponytail, then tied on her apron.

She sipped the beverage and gave the man a smile, “Thanks Joe, you know I don’t make it habitual.”

“Aye, whatever that means. Jennie and Siobhan are already on the floor, and I have Jason and Collin tending bar. I got the buffet set up, and it’s open bar and the gratuities were a part of the deposit, just don’t tell the patrons. Just go make them happy. And Wyn… They all have rides home, lass.”

She smiled at her boss’ thoroughness, and with a quick check of her make up, and a deep breath, Wyn stepped out into the private party room. It was crowded, but still had lots of room to move or dance whichever you decided. She glanced around the room, sizing up her customers as she made her way to the waitress station.

“Mostly men,” she thought as she lumbered her way through. “Whisky, scotch, and beer and lots of it.”

Her coworkers had a map of the tables, split into three sections. “I’ve already got your first round orders in,” Jennie said. “It looks like a fun group. It should be a fun night.”

Wyn smiled and assessed her tables, “Who are these people?”

“Actors, cast and crew or something, whatever they’ve been filming in the Highlands,” Jennie answered. “There’s a couple that aren’t too hard on the eyes, ye ken.”

“Aye, I’m sure there is,” Wyn laughed as a tray of drinks was placed in front of her. “Time to meet my people.” 

Hefting the drinks on her shoulder, she wound her way through the crowd to her designated tables. She placed the tray on a stand, ready to introduce herself, and remind her patrons that she was at their beck and call that evening. “Hullo my lovelies, I am Wyn, and I shall provide whatever it is you need tonight. Within reason.” Her usual bold statement, flirtatious and fun, clipped short when a beautiful set of blue eyes smiled upon her.

“Aye, Wyn. You be gentle with us, and we’ll try not to be too rough wit ye,” Blue eyes said, his voice thick with brogue; rough yet at the same time oddly gentle.

Catching her breath, her brain quickly re-found her wit, “That’s what you think.”

He added a flirty wink that made her knees shake, and she hoped no one noticed.

Heart racing and cheeks beginning to flush from her sheer embarrassment of the apparent attraction, she knew she needed to shake it off and quick if she was going to be able to work He was making it near impossible. His flirtation continued as she handed out the beverages, and she gathered that he was catching on to what her hormones were having a hard time hiding. He playful rearranged all the drinks on the table as she put them down.

“Aye, you wanted me to be gentle.”

He smiled up at her, “Well maybe I lied.”

“You’re fresh,” she laughed, heart in her throat.

“Aye, Sam. Leave the poor lass alone before she flogs ye,” a male counterpart laughed.

Sam. His name was Sam

“I got them in the back, don’t make me break ‘em out.”

He gave her a wink and her heart fluttered and she damned herself in her mind. Wyn quickly asked if she should start another round. She noted the whisky that was in favor and decided to just bring them a bottle to keep their celebratory shots ongoing. 

"Wyn, you’re beginning to match your hair!" Siobhan said as Wyn entered her second round of drinks and filled up pitchers of water.

"You both could of warned me about the hottie," Wyn still found herself trying to catch her breath. 

Jennie laughed, “This is so unlike you. You’re flustered!”

Wyn rolled her eyes, “He’s very flirty. Caught me off guard.”

Siobhan glanced over her shoulder as to check on the party and giggled, ”Wyn, he’s checking out ye arse!”

Wyn blushed again and shook her head, “Oh he is not, quit ye kiddin’. I’m going to hold fast to my rules.” 

Putting her drinks on her tray, Jennie interrupted her, “Weel, maybe ye need to break your rules, because Siobhan isna lying.”

"I won’t date patrons," Jason mimicked in a high pitched voiced. "Or anyone for that matter." 

Wyn glared, “When did this all become about me? I have my rules. There’s reasons why people visit pubs and bars, and I want to hold myself to a higher standard.”

"Only when you got flustered and Mr. Hottie started checking out ye arse! He’s with a party, not on his own accordance, love,” Siobhan laughed.

"I’m a piece of meat then, brilliant." Wyn exhaled, feeling butterflies in her belly as Jason finished the next round of drinks for her.

"You’re not a piece of meat," he winked as the other two girls took off with their orders. "Just a beautiful girl in a bar."

Wyn smiled, “Says the gay man.”

"You’d hit it if I were straight," he retorted and then playfully added, "Work it, Wyn." 

Taking a deep breath, she picked up her tray, and the bottle of Glenfidditch Jason had left in front of her. Working up the courage to serve her orders, she felt Sam’s eyes on her as she steadied her tray. She caught his half smile as she returned, making her palms sweat and her train of thought derailed.

"Here ye go laddies," she said placing the bottle in front of Sam, "I’m afraid I’m moving to slow for ye, it looks and sounds like you’re in a celebrating mood." 

"Aye!" Sam said. "You’ll have a drink with us then?"

"Find me before ye leave, and I’ll share a shot. I need to make sure I keep up with ye first!"

“Oh c’mon, beautiful lass like yourself can handle a nip.”

She smiled, his blue eyes seemingly searing right through to her heart. “Oh I can, no issue there. The issue would be if I celebrated with ye, who would get your whisky?”

The men at the table raised a glass to her comment and tossed their drinks back, “Lass got ye there, Sammy.”

The night wore on, and they drank hard. They toasted anything and everything and were loud, as typical Scots were. She would hear the calls - “Wyyyynnnnn, Wynnie!, Wyn my love!” - that would beckon her over for another round. 

Sam became even more flirtatious. Cheeks red from the alcohol, and speech beginning to slur and his laughter becoming louder. 

Wyn chatted with one of the women in the group, who explained what they were celebrating; a finished half season of a new show for the telly. She went to explain it was a series based on the book “Outlander” and the rowdy ones all played highland scots. Wyn nodded; as a double major in literature and English, she was very much aware of the book. 

Revelry, men and whisky were volatile ingredients. It would usually end up with a slip of the tongue or the connect of the fist, and usually never a man’s finest moment. Wyn, cleaning up some glasses from a table heard the raucous cheer from her flirty table. Sam stood and said something in Gaelic, it caught Wyn’s ears as she too was learning the dead language. An oath or a toast from what she gathered, it was loud and he was drowned out. She smiled as she watched him slam the empty glass down thinking maybe he was different from a regular patron. Her smiled faded just as quick with his follow through, “Aye! The bottle is empty! Where is the wench?!” 

Wyn sighed, disgusted. He was typical. Taking in a deep breath, she grabbed a new bottle from the bar, forced on her smile and brought it over to the table. His happy eyes met hers and she kept her wits, “Your wench is slacking, my apologies!” she chided, sounding more playful than bitter, yet the sentiment stung. 

His eyes turned downward in embarrassment. The remark was probably made in jest - they were filming a historical show - and it was probably used in the scripts, yet she felt insulted. 

Sam’s eyes continued to follow her wherever she went, the humor and fun in them changed to sad and apologetic. She caught his glare as she cleaned the buffet, as she gathered up used glasses and empty bottles and as she checked on other revelers.

"Wyn, that’s short for Winifred, aye?" a slurred voice said behind her startling her a bit, he was looking for any way to start a conversation with her. 

Sam’s eyes were glazed and he smelled like heaven and whisky, and he cast that adorable half smirk at her as he waited for an answer. He gave her no room to be nervous. She gave a smalll laugh as she wiped down the table, the party in it’s stage of winding down. Some had began taking the stage singing karaoke and some danced as their castmates sang horribly, all signs of a successful night at Duke’s.

“Èowyn,” she answered reluctantly, fearing a “Lord Of The Rings” backlash, a question if her parents were hippies or some sort of quip. 

Instead his eyes grew wide. “Sam,” his reply was enhanced with a laugh as he continued, “Named after the wee hobbit.”

Wyn heard herself chuckle and looked at him matter-of-factly, taking in his mop of hair, “You do look like a hobbit, with a bit of a growth problem. Perhaps ye had too many elevensies.”

His laugh was hearty and she found herself laughing with him, “I prefer second breakfast actually. Beautiful name, why shorten it?”

She was glad he didn’t press further, with “Èowyn” being a name of strength and she simply smiled, “I have my reasons,” and she continued to clean up the empty table trying her best to pay very little attention to him. 

“Wyn,” he said his head tilted in an almost shy manner, “Can I ask if you’re available for a dinner perhaps, or a show?”

Her brain suddenly felt like it was was on hyperdrive and a cognitive thought refused to surface. She felt her knees shake a little and was grateful for the table standing between them. He was beautiful, maybe a little out of her league she thought. Then she once again heard the word “wench” in her ears, in his voice. She swallowed hard and offered him a smile, “I’m sorry,” she said feeling her heart in her throat, perhaps trying to stab her brain. “I have a rule, I don’t date patrons.”

Brash, she thought. Too brash. She wasn’t good at this, especially with one so incredibly handsome. He blinked a few times and nodded as he accepted her answer, the embarrassed look taking over his face again.

Feeling her cheeks flush she quickly gathered the glasses on the table, “Sorry,” she muttered an apology again, and quickly scurried back to the kitchen.

Seeing the whole conversation unfurl as he tidied the bar, Jason followed her back, “Did he just…?”

“Yes, and I stuck with my rules.” She was angrily loading the dishwasher and refused to look at him, “Like an idiot, I stuck with my rules.”

He looked at her with sad eyes and shook his head, “Sometimes rules are meant to be broken, Wyn. Even if it means listening to your heart for once.”

“My heart? Too many people make decisions with their heart, only to have it broken.”

Jason wiped down the bar and sighed, “Wyn, broken hearts are what makes us stronger as people. I agree they suck and I know, yes, I know yours took a long time to heal, but what are you going to do when you’re done with school? Immerse yourself into work?”

Wyn glared, “My heart was shattered, mind you. I don’t need a man to wreck it any more than it already is. If broken hearts ensure strength, then I guess I am the strongest person in the world.”

He nodded, “I’m sorry, Wyn. I’m just trying to help. I just don’t want to see you alone.”

She placed the silverware in the container making sure it was loud to exemplify her annoyance, “Then I don’t have to worry about sharing my scars or misery, or having someone take pity on me.”

“Wyn, not everyone is as superficial as you think.”

“No? Perhaps you’re right, yet I am the only person who can protect my heart. After the hit it took, after the loss it suffered, I think alone is okay for now.”

“Wyn…” he continued, feeling horrible that he conjured up the memories of the accident and had made her emotional, “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“Well, you did. I know it wasn’t intentional, and just as I heard myself being summoned as a wench tonight, it still stings.” She finished with the silverware and finished with her tidying, “Can you lock up? I’m going home, it was my night off anyway.”

“Sure thing, “ he replied “See you tomorrow?”

“The vicious circle of rent and school costs along with the lack of Wyn’s love life are ever continuing, I’ll be here.”

He smiled at her shaking his head, “My feisty friend, sweet dreams,” he leaned in and kissed her cheek. “Again, I apologize. I just want to see you happy.”

Accepting his apology she hugged him, “I know. For now though, this insane double major and working here is my happy. I don’t think Blue Eyes, Sam or whatever his name is could change that.”


	2. Chapter Two

Not All Who Wander - Chapter Two

 

Wyn wasn’t exactly sure what her professor was lecturing about. Perhaps it was the lack of sleep the night prior, the pounding headache or the fact that two things continuously ran through her mind; the conversations she had with Jason and with Sam that were mulling her concentration. Knowing that retaining any knowledge from her Literary Theory class was a lost cause she packed up her books and laptop, asked a trusted classmate if they could exchange notes and she left during break.  

 

She tried to relax some before heading in to work to face the Friday night crowd at Dukes. With a  cup of tea, she stretched out on her sofa, Elbereth her white Scottish Fold cat by her side, and her favorite 80’s playlist streaming through her laptop she tried to clear her cluttered mind. Sam’s handsome face, Jason’s honest words, and the troubled past few years continued to flood her thoughts and offered her no peace that afternoon.  

 

Jason was right. She was holding back on life. Allowing herself to be consumed by the solitary tract of school and work, refusing to face her fears. Refusing to let herself feel again.

 

What happened three years ago was a fluke, an accident. Preventable on one end, but on hers, it was simply tragic. With a sigh, the paracetamol barely touching her headache, Wyn scratched Elle’s ears and got up from the sofa, the memory of that day now running circles in her mind.

_The day was filled with fun, and the smiles that were being worn on her parents’ faces eased her mind that she was making the right decision. They had spent the day in Edinburgh with her and Patrick.  Securing some last minute wedding details such as picking up the kilt for Patrick to wear, and enjoyed some shopping and lunch while they were there._

_As the sun began to set they started their trek back to Glasgow. The sun low, Wyn was driving with Patrick seated next to her, and she smiled at the memory of her parents holding hands in the back seat. They talked about the future, of Patricks new job as a teacher and Wyn beginning that major in English, just like her father. Her parents were proud of their youngest, and they made sure she knew.  Their wedding was just weeks away._

_The other car came flying around a blind curve, well above the posted speed limit.  She heard Patrick yell “Eowyn!” and she tried to swerve out of the other vehicles path. The sun blinding and figuratively no place to move, the car hit them head on and sent both vehicles down an embankment, flipping and rolling until they came to a rest on a river bed below._

_It was cold and dark, and she heard Patrick’s moaning in the seat next to her.  Her parents were grossly quiet. She couldn’t see them, but Patrick was still with her._

_“Patrick! Don’t you dare. Don’t you dare leave me!”_

_He reached out and touched her bloody cheek, hand quickly falling and finding hers.  He held it weakly as he searched her eyes. “Eowyn, be strong.  Move on.”  were his final words to her._

_Eowyn Victoria Murray was the only survivor._

_Wyn woke up five days later, alone, in a hospital bed. Her older sister Charlotte,in her grief and anger, had buried their parents the day she woke. Patricks parents at least waited for Wyn to wake, to help with the decision with the death of their son.  Her injuries severe; internal bleeding, broken bones, head trauma and a kidney that would have to be removed, Wyn simply told them that she would respect whatever they chose for Patrick._

_It was two long and painful months before she was released from the hospital. Unable and unwilling to live in the flat she had shared with Patrick, she sought refuge with her childhood friend Jason and used the inheritance and insurance monies for living costs as she continued her recovery._

_A year of pain, surgeries and her sister refusing to acknowledge that she survived, Wyn began work at Dukes, moved out of Jason’s flat and enrolled into the University Of Glasgow opting for a double major in British Literature and English to honour her father._

 

Wyn sighed heavy as she began to get ready for work.  It was Friday so it had the relative promise of a busy night. With the accident still running fresh circles in her mind, she picked up her phone and put a text out to her sister, “I’m sorry Lottie. I miss you.”  The same text she sent her sibling at least once a week, the same text that had gone unanswered, for nearly three years.  It was fruitless. Charlotte blamed Wyn for their parents parents death.  Even though counseling helped her work through most of that pain and kept her thinking rational, she always wondered what if she pulled the wheel in the opposite direction.  Her mind still hanging on to the maybe, and it was difficult to shake when her sister still blamed her.

 

As she stepped from the shower, she stared long and hard at her naked reflection. While clothed, Wyn exuded complete confidence, the scars hidden. Naked was different story. The long scar stretched the length of her abdomen, raised and white it held prominence. Another hidden on the inside of her left thigh appeared whenever she moved her leg. She grabbed a towel and wrapped it quickly around her.  It just wasn’t worth the heartache. Dating, which she had a few dates, sometimes lead to sex and that’s when the rejection hit. They always tried to be nice about it, but Wyn knew, she always knew.

“You’d run too,” she sighed, her thoughts running to the previous night at the bar as her hand skimmed the ridge of her scar “You’re too handsome for the “frankenbody”, I’m just sparing you that awkward moment.”

 

Dukes was already showing signs of it being a busy Friday.  Loud pub music and the clanging of the glass in the dishwasher welcomed Wyn as she entered through the alley door.  She took quick refuge in Joe’s office to finish the last of the dinner she brought with her.  

 

“Hey Shortcake, when ye hit the floor?” Jason asked, causing her to jump as he stuck his head into the office on his way back to the dishwasher.

 

She rolled her eyes, unamused at the scare and the nickname “A few minutes, is it getting busy?”

 

“Nah,” he smirked and added a wink that assured her he was up to something, “Just curious is all.” and he popped back up to the bar.

 

She shook her head and finished the last of her chips before tying on her apron. With a final glance in the mirror and a heavy sigh to shake off the fatigue, Wyn felt ready to face the night.  She picked up a tray of glasses that Jason had left behind and carried them out to the bar to begin her shift. She turned the corner, eyes down, wary of the wall and her awkward cargo.  Placing the glasses on the shelf and cursing Jason for leaving them behind. “Why you left this back there, when you were just there beats the ‘ell outta me, you pain in the arse.” she muttered as she made sure the glasses tinkled loudly as she placed them down.

 

She heard him snicker, “See, I told ye she was feisty.”

 

An eyeroll, and her tongue about to release the snarky remark back, when his words finally clicked in her head.  She looked up and saw him, Sam, sitting at the bar conversing with Jason. “Ye ain’t kidding mate and here i thought it was an act.”

 

Quick with her wit, she saw flowers on the bar and smirked as her insides bubbled and her knees knocked with nerves, “Awww Jase, he brought ye flowers, won’t Cory be jealous?”

 

Jason shot her a smile and nudged her, “I’ll leave ye two alone, Sam here has something to say to ye.”

 

Her feet feeling like they were Jello attached to boulders, she ambled her way to the side of the bar he was sitting at.  His hair was combed back, which allowed his curls to spring at his neck.. His tshirt clung to his pecs like a glove and Wyn felt her breath hitch as she thought about touching them. “You’re persistent,” she smiled, hoping to hide her nerves and the fact that she was happy to see him again.

 

He picked up the flowers, and for an actor his nervousness was apparent and Wyn thought it incredibly adorable, “I owe you an apology, for words I said last night that likely offended you.”  He handed her the flowers endearingly, an apologetic look on his face and his eyes bore through her, “I used poor judgement.”

 

This was a first, and Wyn found herself speechless, “I...ye… you were drinking, it happens,” she stammered as she took the flowers, a mix of daisies, pink and yellow roses and a thistle; her heart pounding in her chest.

 

“No,” he replied softly, a blush growing on his cheeks, “I see why you don’t date patrons. My apologies Ms. Wyn, for being a complete and total arse.”

 

She chuckled, leaning against the bar to calm her nerves, “Thank you Sam,” she said, or that’s what it sounded like in her head, “I accept your apology.  These are absolutely beautiful.”

 

His smile beamed and the butterflies flew wild in her tummy, “And if I am not mistaken, I still owe ye a drink.  Could I be so bold to re-offer dinner with that?”

She drew in a deep breath that he noticed, and his smile dropped a bit.  Her headstrong ways wanted to stay true. She pondered it, the future rejection if it ever got that far and she blinked the fear back from her eyes.  She heard Jason clear his throat in a fake “I heard that and you better take him up on it” from behind her, and she smiled.  Courage rose from her belly and her eyes met his, “Sure.  I’d really like that.”

 

“She’s off Sunday!” Jason called from the other side of the bar.

 

Wyn rolled her eyes towards Sam, and they both shared the laugh as the butterflies erupted in her belly, “Sunday then,” he said, eyes bright and his smile to match, “Sevenish?”

 

“Sevenish is fine.” she agreed finding herself more smitten with his shyness.

 

They exchanged mobile numbers and he promised to call her the following afternoon to finalize. She placed his number in her back pocket and she swore she could feel it’s heat.

 

“Tomorrow, I’ll call ye,” he reminded her, smile still beaming as he locked his phone, now containing her number. “Good night Wyn.”

 

“Good night, Sam.” she replied as he winked and left the bar.  She took a deep breath, inhaled the sweet scent of her flowers and got lost in her moment.

 

“You’re smitten.” Jason laughed softly as Wyn made her way back to the office to put her flowers in water.

 

“I’m not sure about smitten, it’s only a date,” she sighed.

 

“Hot actor too.” Jason kidded as Wyn slanted her eyes at him, “What? I had to make sure he was legit, can’t let ye date just anyone.”

 

Wyn smiled at her friend, and shook her head, “Well, guess we’ll find out on Sunday, aye.”

 

*~*~*~*~*

 

Wyn stared at the four dresses she owned that were sprawled upon her bed as she cursed herself for not expanding her wardrobe.  

With a process of elimination, she automatically tossed out the little black dress, “It’s Sunday, and a first date. No way.”

 

She finally decided on a blue sweater dress that warmed her skin and deepened her blue/green eyes, paired with tights and boots, “Play it safe Eowyn. Ye haven’t spent this much time getting ready for a date in ages.”

 

The knock on her door both startled her and roused the butterflies in her tummy. She had thought about meeting him, but the weather being typical Glaswegian he had offered to pick her up.  Taking a deep breath she smoothed her dress, checked the peephole and smiled as she watched him nervously pace in front of her door.  A small laugh escaped her lips and she unlocked her door, “Hi Sam.”

 

He looked shocked that she opened the door and his smile lit up his face, “Wyn, Hi!  You look lovely!”

 

She snorted at his choice of words, and the look of infatuation on his face, a look she hadn’t seen from a man since Patrick. She bit her lip and shook the memory from her mind.  She stepped aside, inviting him in, “I’ll just be a minute,” she said closing the door behind him, “sorry to be so typical.”

 

“No worries Wyn. I am a wee bit early.” he countered as he scanned her flat.

 

“Um, make yourself comfortable. can I get ye a drink?” she asked wringing her hands. He laughed as her voice squeaked a bit, “First dates are always so awkward, ye ken?”

 

“Aye,” he agreed, “And I’m thinking this is as awkward as it will get. Go finish, I’ll wait right here.”

 

She twisted her hands again and offered him a smile as she quickly turned and hurried back to her bedroom, “God Wyn, get it together.”

 

Sam glanced around her small, clean flat. His eyes widened at the stack of books that were piled on the table, set off by the flowers he had brought her a few days prior, “Literary Theory, Writing and Ideology, Linguistics…” he breathed as he read some of the titles aloud, “she has a penchant for words.”

 

He walked around to her sofa and took a seat, and eyed a few pictures that were on the wall. There was a picture of an older couple that he assumed were her parents and a larger picture that peaked his interest.  It was taken on top of a Munro, but he couldn’t place where in Scotland it was.  Wyn was in the center, pigtails coming out from under a beanie, flanked by two men.  He recognized one as Jason, her friend from the bar.  The other had to have had some importance, the body language between the two was intimate as their heads were touching. The same man was in another picture with only her and he was kissing her temple.

His curiosity was broken by a wet nose and a loud purr as Elbereth nudged him wanting attention, “Well hello there.” he said as she curled in his lap.

 

“Huh,” Wyn said as she stepped around the sofa, “she is usually pretty shy around new people.  I’ll take that as a good sign.  Sam, meet Elbereth.”

 

“Another Tolkien reference.” he said scratching Elle’s ears.

 

“t fits her. She’s a fairly good judge of people.” Wyn replied.

 

“A trusty companion,” another quick pat to her ears and Sam rose to his feet. Wyn, glad she chose boots with a bit of a heel took his arm when he offered it, “Your servant madam.”

 

~**~*~*~*~*~*~

 

“I think someone should do a study on why first dates can be so nerve wracking. I mean, there’s at least an attraction, ye ken. A mutual thing, mind and body.” Wyn rambled glad for the glass of wine and the small quiet booth.

 

He smiled, “Especially virtual strangers.”

 

“Well, I think we’re on our way to ending that.” she felt the blush rise in her cheeks.

 

And it was comfortable.  

 

The conversation flowed easily between them.  He listened with wonderment about her studies, and her plans to eventually follow in her fathers footsteps and teach.  That her double major was exhausting her, and she never imagined herself working at a pub.

 

“I lost my parents a few years back, “she explained traipsing around the accident, “It kind of set me back, ye ken.”

 

She heard him clear his throat, “I’m sorry Wyn.  I take it they went together?”

 

She nodded, took a long sip of her wine and a deep breath, shaking the memory from her mind.  Now was not the time to delve into the accident, or to even feel sad.  She perked up and forced a smile at him, and he reciprocated which brought the comfort level back, “Just assures me that they’ll always be happy.”

 

She was intrigued with his stories of his career and the places he had been.  He had travelled nearly around the world, and had settled in London for several years. “More work in London. Scotland is growing in the industry, but for many years, it was all coming out of London.”

 

“Do you prefer stage or screen, or is there a preference?” she asked enamored by his choice of career.

 

“Oh both!” he answered quickly, “Big productions are fun and fulfulling and loads of work, but home is on stage.”

 

“So you moved back to Scotland, because of the show?” she asked, possibly for her own benefit.

 

His smile was big, “Aye, seemed like the right time to come back to bonny Scotland.”

 

The meal was exquisite, and they giggled as they both floundered with chopsticks as they dined on sushi. The bond was forming.  He made her laugh, and he found her wit quick and delightful.

They both decided that a walk in the gardens was warranted, The rain had subsided for now,  there were a few others taking advantage of the late spring evening.  They walked in comfortable silence for a bit, enjoying the newly found company of each other.  He eventually shyly reached out and took her hand, Wyn responding by lacing her fingers with his. His hand was warm and held hers completely. His thumb caressed the outside of her hand and that simple touch made her feel secure.

 

 “I think this warrants a second date?” he asked sounding a bit shy as they walked.

 

“Hmm, and maybe a third.” she replied, “I had a very good time tonight, Sam.”

 

He chuckled, “Then maybe I could attain a fourth? I’m glad you changed your mind… about dating a patron.”

 

She nudged into him, as she recalled the conversation from the first time they met “I am too.”

 

In true Glaswegian style the sky opened up and the rain came pouring down again.  They ran for shelter under a covered bench and broke down in laughter, “Ye think after living here most my life I’d carry an umbrella!” he laughed.

 

Wyn shivered a bit, the rain cold as they watched it fall.  He slipped off his dinner jacket and wrapped it around her shoulders, his scent making her dizzy, “Thank you,” she replied pulling the garment tight around her and moving herself closer to him, “We’re true Scots, who needs ‘em.”  

 

He wrapped his arm around her, pulling her even closer to him and she smiled shyly at him.  “Aye, but you’ll get soaked through going back to the car,” he said.

 

“Perhaps. The rain will stop eventually, and the company is rather enjoyable.” she replied surprising herself.  

 

They caught each others eye, and studied each other for a few moments. Wyn felt her heartbeat race and she bit her lip, anticipating what she wanted in her mind; to feel his lips on hers. “Aye, t’is.” he sighed with a look in his eyes that could only describe what she was thinking, “Can I?” he asked, “Kiss ye that is.”

 

Wyn licked her lips and her eyes answered for her. His lips were soft and warm, molding perfectly with hers.  Her heart raced, and her mouth parted for his, and he sweetly took advantage.  She felt her toes curl as he wrapped his fingers in her hair at the the base of her neck and her fingers followed suit, twisting in the dampened ringlets that lined his. They pulled away, both breathless and she licked her lips again, tasting him.  “I’ve wanted to do that since the moment I laid eyes on ye.” he said softly, forehead resting on hers.

 

“Could ye do it again?” she asked, still unable to catch her breath, the moment and time freezing as his lips pressed against hers again.

 

They parted again with a chuckle, “So when is date number two?” he laughed.

 

She kissed him chastely, finding herself feeling emotions that she hadn’t felt in quite some time, “I’m not sure I want the first one to end.”

  
  
  
  
  
  



	3. Chapter Three

Three

“Did ye tell him yet?” 

That particular question was loaded and Wyn glared at Jason as they finished cleaning the pub as they closed. 

“No.” She uttered, turning her back on him, the feeling of insecurity welling and the fear of abandonment right along with it. 

“I think ye should, it’s been what, a bit over a month? Canna keep it from him forever, ye ken? Has he seen ye scars?” Wyn twisted her mouth, trying to conceal the nausea and irritation she was developing from his line of questioning. She caught Jasons eye and the look he gave her was matter-of-fact. “Can’t be celibate forever or are ye planning on surprising him on ye wedding night?” 

“Jason, I know. And I have tried to bring up the accident and trust me, it gets harder to push his hands away, because I really like him. I’m just scared that once he knows, that once he sees he’ll be like the others and it’ll all be typical, he’ll be disgusted and ‘so long Wyn’.” 

She exhaled loudly, her mind thinking back to the whirlwind of the past few weeks. Her and Sam had really connected, even with their erratic schedules they had found the time to see each other. Coffee dates, lunch dates, dinner dates, meeting in between her classes just to take a walk and talk, and each time his kisses became more irresistible and his touch became more heated. She warmed at the thought of his hands on her, drawing her closer to him. Their encounters became more passionate, each time he was a perfect gentleman and he respected her, no complaints, when his hands roamed too freely and she pushed them away. 

“I don’t see Sam being that way, Wyn.” 

“I’ve tried, Jason,” she plopped herself into a chair and heaved a sigh, “I just freeze and can't do it,” Jason took the seat next to her, knowing the fear she had, “I just like how it is right now, it’s pure between us. No accident, no scars, no baggage…” 

“No sex,” he interrupted and received an eyeroll from her, “The anniversary of that day is coming Wyn. Don’t make it harder on yourself. I know how ye get and ye have every right to grieve and mourn. And I have seen ye two together, I know he cares for ye a lot, more than these other guys I’ve see ye with. This is actually a relationship, Shortcake.” 

Wyn twisted her hands nervously and nodded, “I know the longer I wait it will get worse and it’s getting very hard to control that urge. It’s the first time since Patrick since I’ve had real feelings for a man. I don't want to lose him." 

Jason leaned in and kissed her temple, “I know, and seeing you vibrant and glowing and the way you smile when he comes in, I think Pat would like him too.” 

“Jason don’t…” she sighed at her friends affirmation. “If he were here, we wouldn't be having this conversation” her voice trailed, there were times that she still very much missed him. 

“Sorry,” he took her hands and squeezed them “I miss him too, but if he had to choose someone for his Eowyn, “ he cleared his throat and inhaled deeply, “Ye need to tell him, and ye need to tell him soon. Come on, I’ll drive ye home.” 

*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

Wyn relaxed against Sam, his body giving her the perfect cushion as she read and highlighted her text book. His arm was wrapped around her, and he paid no attention to the movie that he brought over. Wyn was studying for finals, so Sam brought over dinner and the movie just to spend a little time with her. Her hair parted exposing her neck as she leaned over her book. He smiled as he eyed the exposed skin, clearly an invitation to kiss. He smoothly leaned over and his lips whispered her neck at first. Wyn gasped, the kiss tingling all senses of her body, creating chill bumps. He kissed her again, and she felt his tongue on her skin, and the ache in her belly began. “Sam,” she laughed breathlessly, “I have to study.” 

He chuckled at her, “I know, but ye have this beautiful line of freckles that just begged to be kissed.” 

He kissed her neck again and she inhaled deeply, trying to calm her arousal. It was useless and his lips found their way to hers, “You’re very distracting,” she giggled in between kisses. 

“Sometimes a break helps with studies,” he replied, his hand creeping up the outside of her shirt, brushing against her breast as it made its way up to cup her face.   
She felt herself begin to panic, she knew where this was going. Her heart thumped wildly, more from panic than lust as he deepened the kiss. He removed the book from her lap and pressed her back on the sofa. His weight on her was delicious. She felt his thumb caress her hip bone, an area which she knew was scarred and the panic set in. 

“Sam.” her voice cracked, escaping the thick lust that enveloped her and finished with a squeak as she moved his hand. He eased back, brows furrowed, his blue eyes swimming with concern, Wyn’s brain screaming to tell him, her body screaming to feel his touch on her again, “I...I can’t” His brows tightened as she continued, “There’s something…”she swallowed hard and felt her heart in her throat “Tell him NOW Eowyn! NOW!” She opened her mouth to speak and nothing came of it, betrayed by her own self. 

He gave her a half smile, the one that had her wrapped from the very beginning, “Lassie problems?” he said then kissed her cheek. 

She shook her head, and in the same split second her brain caught on to the free pass. She nodded and looked him straight in the eyes, “yeah. sorry.” Her hands went straight to his belt, as she felt the guilt and cowardice weigh heavy, her brain screaming at her again, “I can,...let me…” 

Her mind felt scrambled, afraid he would lose interest in her, the need to pleasure him, more out of guilt than gratification. Her hands shook and he placed his on hers, “Wyn it’s alright.” 

She caught his eye and quickly looked away, “I’m sorry, “she muttered and she wondered if he could tell if she was hiding something, “once this term is over, it won’t be so crazy.” 

He kissed her forehead then her lips, letting his linger for a moment, “Aye, you’re special Wyn. I want ye to know that.” He kissed her again, his teeth nibbling a bit on her lip. “Let me take my leave, and let you study. I do have to go on a trip this week for show things, so I’ll be out of ye hair until your finals are done. Maybe when I come back, I can sneak ye away?” 

Wyn exhaled and smiled, and followed that with a kiss of her own, “I’d like that a lot.” 

*~*~*~*~*~ 

A reprieve, yet it weighed on her mind. 

She took her finals and tried to avoid Sam’s calls when she could, using the exams as an excuse. He would be back in Glasgow that Sunday evening, and with the anniversary of the accident and the loss of her loved ones that Saturday, it gave he the space and the time to rebuild her courage. 

That saturday morning, she and Jason along with Cory travelled to the accident site. She walked down the embankment to the riverbed. She brought three roses with her, plus a thistle for the other driver. She stood stoic, her emotion bubbling. 

“I’m sorry.” she whispered as she laid the roses down. “This is the best I could do.” 

Her sister wouldn’t even tell Jason where her parents were buried. She and Jason searched numerous records to no avail, of the thousands of cemeteries in Scotland and the thousands of Murray’s contained in them. She swore one day she would see them again. 

He gave her a few minutes alone, letting her cry. She truly allowed herself only this day. The day when her life changed. She was brave and strong and bold and wise, she had heart and wit, but on this one day, she caved and she mourned. He was with her as she rebuilt, the only family she had. It angered him that Charlotte abandoned her, that she blamed Eowyn for the accident, that she blamed Wyn for a lot of things that went wrong in her life, to him this was irreprehensible. He knew the sisters nearly his whole life, and Charlotte always loathed Eowyn. 

He took a seat on the mossy ground next to her, and Cory flanked her other side. He wrapped his arm around her and she cried into his shoulder, like she did every year. Her pain and her broken heart radiating to him. 

“I got ye Eowyn.” he assured, “Always will” 

She didn’t say anything, just sobbed against him. She had hoped this year would be different, that she wouldn’t cry as much, that she would be able to hold it together, that having the beginning of a relationship would help, but it was the same. Her heart breaking as it had every year. Patrick's dying voice ringing loud in her ears, “Eowyn, be strong. Move on. I love you, Eowyn.” 

“I’m trying, Patrick.” she sobbed to herself, “I really am.” 

The visit cut short because of the pouring rain, Jason dropped her off back at her flat and made sure she was comfortable. He promised her a late night dinner when his shift was over. “I’ll probably just sleep.” she assured him. 

“Do whatever makes ye happy, lass.” he said, “Don’t be afraid to call if ye need company.” 

She smiled at him, Cory had offered to stay with her, but she declined, “Thanks guys. I just want to be alone.” 

“Aye.” Jason kissed her cheek, “I’ll see you later. gotta keep Dukes afloat, if the rain dinna stop we may just do that.” 

She exhaled loudly, the heavy feeling of sadness and guilt encompassing her. She embraced her friend, the one person the truly still loved her, “I love you Jason.”

He smiled, “I love you too Shortcake.” 

With the door locked and chained, Wyn changed into an oversized t-shirt put her cheesy 80’s playlist on and crawled back into bed, her hand gliding along the raised scars on her belly. Tears fell as she curled herself into a ball, feeling guilt for surviving, feeling guilt for missing him. Elbereth crawled into bed with her. The cats soft purring and with the rains gentle tapping against the window, Eowyn fell into a restless sleep. 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Sam walked into Dukes and shook the rain off. Not expected to be back in Glasgow until the following evening, he wanted to surprise Wyn. He missed her, and she seemed a bit distant while he was away. He blamed it on her finals, the stress of studying and working. He missed her shyness, the first girl that he had dated that wasn’t all about climbing into bed with him. She had intelligence, and morals. She was educated, witty and somewhat mysterious, and he was falling for her hard. 

He caught sight of Jason, and took a seat at the bar. Jason came down to where Sam sat, a glass and whisky ready to place in front of him. “Wyn said ye were out of town.” 

“Weather cut it short, figured I’d surprise her, maybe take her out to relax a bit,” he looked around the bar, and didn’t catch sight of her, “Where is she at?”

Jason froze, realizing that Sam still had no idea what today meant, and quickly tried to think of a way to distract him until at least tomorrow, “Aye, she took a personal day.” 

“Is she sick? Is she alright? She’d been avoiding a lot of my calls this past week.” 

“Don’t take it personal, she’s got a one track mind when it comes to school. And she’s fine. I promise.” Jason explained, hellbent on protecting his friends secret. 

Sam knocked back the whisky and studied Jason, knowing from the body language that he was hiding something, “I’ll go to her place, check on her.” 

Jason looked up from the bottles he was counting and looked Sam in the eyes, “I’d advise that ye don’t do that. I told ye she’s fine, ye can check on her tomorrow.” 

Sam, irked by his tone and his suspicion growing, mirrored the look, “And I say I’m worried about her, and want to see her.” 

“And I’m tellin’ ye not to! Give the lass a rest! I’m tellin’ ye she’s fine!” 

Teeth clenched, Sam felt his tension rise as Jason clearly hid what was going on with Wyn, “There be another man? Is that it?’ He felt his chest tighten, all the times she had rejected his advances culminating in his thoughts. 

Jason scoffed, “No, ye knob. Just leave her be.” 

Sam squinted his eyes at him, a fury growing inside him, “No, I’m going to check on her,” he grabbed his coat and made steps to leave. 

Jason motioned to Colin to watch the bar, and he caught up with Sam before he made it to the door. He grabbed his arm, and pulled him into a corner away from the few patrons that braved the rain, “Look, I ain’t one to start a fight, especially in my place of employment, but I am telling ye to leave the lass alone. Ye give her tonight, and tomorrow will be all well.” 

Sam flinched out of Jason’s grip and grunted, “An’ I’m tellin’ ye, I think ye keeping something from me.” 

“I am, and it ain’t what ye think.” Jason snarled through gritted teeth. 

“Then tell me what the hell is going on.” The rage in Sam’s eyes equaled Jason’s, both sharing that rage for one thing, Eowyn. “‘Cause I’m willing to take my chances and see her.” 

Jason seethed, “Aye forgive me Eowyn, but I had to tell ye hard heided sorry sot, but ye left me no choice.” muttering to himself, eyes never leaving Sam’s, “ What I'm fixin' to tell ye should have come directly from her, but she's too mucked up in fear to do it, "Jason took a deep breath and thought for a moment, unsure of whom he was more angry at, Èowyn or Sam, "She was the only survivor of a car accident that took the lives of both her parent’s and her fiancé. Still don't know how she lived, and there was a time I didn't think she would; she was so bad off. They were coming back from Edinburgh doin’ some wedding shit and a drunk driver hit them head on. Three years ago today. That lass has endured more heartache in the past three years that most people will see in a lifetime. Now, my only reasoning that she hadn’t told ye is because she’s smitten wit ye, and she’s afraid of how ye will react to her scars. She's been made to feel self conscious about them, bastards, the lot of them." Sam’s eyes widened, the information sinking in and the feeling of untrust gripping at his mind. Jason saw that, and sneered at him, feeling the need to protect his best friend to no end, “And I will tell ye this; I was there with her nearly every minute they allowed, I've seen her pain and I've seen her heart break. I've had to help her pick up all the pieces. She's the first and only woman I've ever loved, and I love her more than any man walking this earth right now, if ye hurt her I’ll make sure ye feel her pain and more, ye ken?” 

Sam eased back and nodded, “Well then, I guess I’ll have to prove ye wrong.” 

*~*~*~*~*~ 

Wyn cocooned herself in her blankets. Shielded from the day, not wanting to even leave the bed to eat let alone function. Her room was dark, except for the candles she had lit, and the rain continued its melancholy symphony against her window pane. She checked her phone periodically, hoping for anything from Charlotte, and as usual there was nothing. She allowed herself to cry, and she sometimes imagined Patricks hands on her. It was all she knew, how he used to hold her at night. She cried for that loss, the intimacy, the life she should be having. And she cried for Sam, and the fear of telling him, the lack of confidence she had and the wanting to further her relationship with him, the slight pang of guilt for allowing herself to fall for him. She grabbed a tissue off her night table and dabbed at her eyes. They felt raw and swollen as did her nose, a small punishment for living through that horrible day. 

The knock on the door startled her. She wasn’t expecting Jason for quite some time. She rolled out of bed and wrapped her duvet around her, thinking it was Cory checking up on her or maybe Jason had left work early. She unchained the door, and twisted the lock not even thinking to look through the peephole. Tightening the duvet around her she opened the door, and felt her heart break. 

“Sam.” 

He stood in the doorway, rain dripping from his hair, his jacket soaked and he stood, eyes slanted with a need and a want for understanding. Wyn felt her panic rise, “No, You’re not allowed to break my heart today.” 

He didn’t move but offered a glare, “Ye dinna even trust me with ye heart, how can I break it?” His voice was a low growl, and Wyn felt her heart in her throat, a sob choked out as his eyes bore down on her. His words hung heavy in her ears, “Ye havena been very open with me Wyn.   
She shook her head in disbelief, that this wasn’t happening, that he was still out of town, not standing in front of her sopping wet and demanding answers, “No.” she managed, “No,” and she tried to close the door.   
Sams foot caught the door before she was able to move it much, “Ye need to tell me what’s going on, before we’re both standing here in pieces,” his voice was rough, and she stood unmoving, numb from his words and his eyes. 

“Sam, go away, please,” she begged, her eyes unable to meet his, her thoughts racing on how he knew, if this was the end of their relationship, and why her heart hurt so bad. 

“No, ye either let me in, or I force myself in, Eowyn. We need to talk and it needs to be now.” her gasp told him that he frightened her, and while that was the last thing he wanted to do he had to know if he even had a chance with this woman, one that he fell deeper for every day. 

Her breath hitched and she wrapped the duvet tightly around her, stepped aside and allowed him him. Her eyes downcast, she wasn’t able to watch him as he shrugged off his coat, and made his way to her bathroom to get a towel. She stood by the door unmoving, head down, concentrating on the drops of water he trailed in under her toes. 

Sam eyed her, as she stood head down in front of the door. This wasn’t the woman he had been dating and falling for the past several weeks. Hair disheveled, eyes red rimmed and swollen from her tears and wrapped tightly in a duvet and not much else, Wyn stood in the doorway, silent. 

“I had a talk with ye friend, and I need to know, if I ever had the chance to love ye Wyn, or is this some kind of game? Some kind of act?” Anger. She detected anger in his voice. “Not today Sam, please. Not today.” Her mind quickly pieced together how and why. He must of came from Dukes and Jason had told him. 

She shook off a sob, his tone and line of questioning splintering into her. “Do you actually think I could be so low?” she asked, managing to look at him, his eyes still wild and angry. 

“I don’t know Wyn,” he said, “I’m not sure what to believe. You hid this from me, and another man vies for your attentions. You dinna trust me. I’m at a loss here. I’m hurt, I’m confused, my heart’s in a vice, Wyn”

Wyn closed her eyes, the sting of his accusations was like lemon juice on a very open wound. Her lip quivered, and her chest tightened, “You’re at a loss.” she whispered, and finally looked him in the eyes, “You come here, now knowing what you know, and you compare loss? I lost my life that day Sam, and I’ve spent the last three years trying to figure out what the fuck I’m supposed to be doing? Everything ceased! And you’re at a loss?” 

“Eowyn. I just need to know.” 

She shook her head, his poor choice of words still doing their damage, trying her hardest to hold her emotion. The tears began to fall, feeling accused, cornered, and heart broken, her voice wavered, “I was letting myself go, allowing myself to fall for you. For the first time since he was taken from me, I felt that I could love again. Maybe? Or maybe I was being foolish again? A little understanding perhaps?” 

“Are you with Jason?” he asked 

“Really, Sam?” she cried, “He’s protective! He says stupid shit, he’s gay! What do you want from me, Sam? Yes! I hid this from you, because so many times before I was dumped on my ass and called repulsive, so excuse me Sam for being hesitant!” Her face flushed, and she felt her ears burn as the tears freely flowed, she shook her head, and uttered weakly “You did break my heart today, Sam. Thank you for making this day more memorable for me. I think maybe you should leave, Please.” His eyes slanted, piercing her very being, “And please stop looking at me like that.” 

He didn’t move, and neither did she,and he visibly searched for words “Is that Patrick?” he asked nodding to the picture on the wall. He let his emotions get the best of him, and the hurt was evident. 

She nodded, eyes casting downward again as she cried. She didn’t see him approach her as she sobbed, “You shouldn’t be here, I shouldn’t be here. It’s not supposed to be like this. I should be a wife, a mother, not some kid working at a bar serving what killed her family,” her rambles continued, the outpouring of a broken heart. He inched closer to her, guilt tugging at his heart. A huge mistake on his part. 

“Wyn,” he sighed, his hand gently touching her shoulder. She flinched, and it pained him. She slowly warmed to his touch, as he placed his hand on her other shoulder. She tightened the duvet ever closer around her and he felt her shaking, “Eowyn, forgive me.” 

She sniffled, trying to contain her sobs, “Go Sam, before you’re repulsed like the others. Let me do you that favor. I’ll just lose you too.” He took her in his arms, with no response from her. Eowyn held tight to the duvet that wrapped around her, "Sam, go." 

"Forgive me." He whispered into her hair, "my head got before my heart." 

She shook her head into his chest, trying not to admit to herself through her hurt and anger that his embrace comforted her. "Sam, go. Please." 

His embrace became tighter, holding her head to his chest and her sobs increased. "I'm so sorry, Wyn," he kissed her forehead and swallowed hard as he endured her emotion. "I'll go." 

She felt him loosen his embrace and her breath hitched, "Sam," she mustered the energy to bring her eyes to his, "stay?" 

He cocked a half smile at her, and ran his thumbs over her cheeks to wipe the tears that stained them "Ye so beautiful, Wyn. When ye happy and witty, and studying and concentrating, and when ye passionate and emotional. Ye everything to me. If it's love, then so be it, let's embrace it because from the first time I saw ye I knew ye were something special." 

"But.." She sniffled, knowing the scars that he still hadn't seen. 

"Èowyn, ye beautiful. Heart, mind and body. There's nothing that will change my mind on that," her lip quivered as her anxiety welled. He tucked his fingers under her chin and brought her eyes to his, "nothing." 

His lips melded perfectly against hers. Chaste at first, as her mind still muddled with emotions, cleared and her heart embraced it. She believed him,as his hand slipped behind her head, fingers threading in her hair. She deepened it, on her tip toes to match his height her hands let go of the duvet allowing it to drop. 

She stood before him, in a t-shirt and panties. Her heart raced and she shook, not sure if it was nerves or the rush of cooler air. "Ye trust me Wyn?" He asked, his hand on her cheek keeping her eyes focused on his, "because I just want to love ye." 

"Sam?" was all she could muster before he took her lips again. The kiss deep, as her fingers twisted in his hair, pulling him closer. Her toes curled, and the soft moan that emitted from her throat, full of want and need for him, made him dizzy. 

"What is it Wyn?" He asked, acknowledging her question, lips barely leaving hers as he nibbled on her bottom lip. 

"Take me to bed."


	4. Chapter Four

Chapter Four 

Sam searched her eyes, knowing that if he asked Eowyn’s sureness it would insult her. The tears still fell from her eyes. The pain he caused her, the pain from the broken heart she suffered all still evident.   
He kissed her lips lightly, tasting the salt from her tears, “Sam, please.” barely a whisper as it escaped her, yet clear and concise to her wants and needs. 

He scooped her up easily in a bridal style, his eyes never leaving hers. She cupped his face and kissed him, gently and sweetly as he began to walk her down the short corridor to her room.   
It was dark, but the candlelight showed enough. A bed full of blankets, quilts and books, decorated sparingly but feminine. Elbereth, who was napping, hopped down with a graceful thud maybe in knowing that her human needed some privacy. Eowyn shivered, nerves and anticipation coursing through her as he set her down gently on the mattress.

“Do ye need more blankets?” Sam said breaking the ice, he could feel her tension 

She answered with a smile, as she set on her knees to match his height,“I get chilled.” 

“Well, I’ll keep ye warm tonight,” he said then crashed his lips against hers passionately, and her sharp inhale signaled her want for him, “and for however long you’ll let me.” 

He pulled his shirt over his head and her breath hitched, her hand automatically going to his chest, fingers gently dancing on his skin. He was beautiful. Hard with muscle, his skin was warm under her fingers and she wanted to feel his skin on hers, his warmth against her and the only barrier she had was the t-shirt she wore. 

His hands found her hips and he closed the gap between them. From the conversation earlier he knew her hesitation, of what she was hiding, and that she was self conscious about her healed injuries. It didn’t matter to him. This beautiful, and intelligent woman that was before him was more than marred skin. His hands crept up her shirt, and he could feel the raised lines of the scar on her belly. Her breathing was staccato, nervous energy coursed through her, and her eyes diverted from his. He wanted to calm her, relax her, he wanted her to enjoy the pleasure he was about the give her. “Look at me Eowyn,” he said softly as her eyes slowly once again met his, “You can keep the shirt on, but I want to feel you against me, to see all of you, but I understand. You’re beautiful Wyn, and I fell for you, just the way you are.” 

She swallowed hard, his words full of honesty, and his eyes carried the lust for him. She nodded. If this was going to work, he had to see, she had to trust him. He gently pulled the shirt over her head, revealing her to him. Her hands went to cover her scars, a nervous habit, and he took them gently. He saw perfection in that slightly darkened room. Tears again fell from her eyes as the anxiety built, and he pulled her close to him and he kissed her hard. She sighed his name into his mouth and took all his power to not lose control. 

His conscious screamed to take her quick to ease the weeks of frustration, to silence the anger of the argument and truth a few mere minutes before. His heart wanted her. It wanted to taste her, to feel her, to learn her...to fall in love with her. His hands wrapped in her hair and he gently pulled, exposing her neck to him, and his mouth and tongue quickly found their way there. One palm brushed against her breast, and the nipple hardened beneath his touch. He began a trail of hot wet kisses, took one nipple in his mouth and her sharp inhale, and her fingers tugging in his hair signaled her relaxing, her enjoyment as he suckled the hardened bead. Her hands still wrapped in his hair, he trailed further, to the raised white skin that began under her breast. A half sob half sigh came from her throat and he kissed her scar, trailing down her belly. She tensed, and she shivered, nerves getting the best of her. 

He wrapped his arms around her, and gently laid her down, “Relax, “ he murmured as he started his hot wet kisses down her belly again stopping at the top of her panties with a hoarse laugh, “Hello Kitty.” 

Wyn chuckled as he kissed her panty line, “Don’t mock my knickers.” 

He snickered, then kissed her sex through the cartoon garments and she gasped. “I want what’s under these knickers,” gently pulled them down exposing her to him, “Goodbye Kitty.” 

She giggled and she relaxed once again under his touch as he gently spread her legs. kissing her inner thigh and the scar that ran along there, and she gasped and arched as his tongue ran along the slit of her sex. She felt him grin against her as she sighed his name rolling her hips as his teeth, lips and tongue began their quest to pleasure her. She heard his growl as he slowly slipped a finger inside her, and her hand grasped his hair, pulling his mouth closer to her. His chuckle vibrated against her sensitive flesh and she purred as her hips once again bucked, “Easy Kitten,” he said softly against her, his arm reaching up to fondle a breast and keeping her motion in check. 

Her thighs began to quiver as he continued his domination, another finger joining the first and her voice became more high pitched. He ached, and his cock begged for freedom. With a quick motion, he quickly undid his pants, and set it free. Wyn heaved as his fingers and tongue continued their soft torture on her, her moans and cries became louder, his name became a Saint on her lips as her first wave of pleasure peaked high clenching and washing around his fingers. 

Wyn panted, her eyes dilated with the ecstacy of her orgasm. She needed him, she wanted more of him, all of him. She quickly rolled on top of him, and was greeted with the grin she loved. He was rock solid against her backside, and she rocked against him as she leaned in and kissed him hard, the taste of her heavy on his lips. “I need you.” she said, his blue eyes showing her the same amount of passion. “I need you now, Sam.” 

She reached to her bedside table, and pulled a condom from her top drawer. She prayed it wouldn’t kill the mood, but without words and the twitch of his cock in her hand it wasn’t an issue. She stroked him a few times, his head lolling back as she dominated him, legs straddled on each side of him. He hissed when she kissed the tip of his shaft, tasting the salty sweet essence of him. She rolled the condom over him, and he flipped her on to her back. He grabbed her hands, and slipped slowly inside her. He watched her eyes and her face contort as she stretched for him, biting her lip as the pleasure/pain threshold washed over her, the effect of their first connection “You had my heart from the first time I saw ye Eowyn,” 

Her legs wrapped around his waist as his movement was slow and rhythmic, enjoying the feel of her under him, the warmth he sheathed himself in, the soft moans of his name she emitted as her fingernails raked his back. 

He caught her eye, locked in a passionate stare he kissed her hard. His heart raced, as he grabbed her hands and thrust himself hard into her. The arch of her back towards him, and the heel of her foot dug into the small of his back told him she was close, and he wasn’t far behind. 

Wyn climaxed, her voice high and intoxicating as she tightened around him. Sam thrust himself deep as she pulled him closer to her, when he finally let go. 

She curled herself to him and he rolled off her, not breaking their connection wrapped her tightly in his arms. “Don’t let go of me.” she whispered. 

“Not in this lifetime.” he answered as the curve of her body settled into his. 

\-------------

It was still quite dark when Sam woke. The digital clock on the bedside table told him the sun should be rising, but the grey darkness outside insisted another story. He stretched gently, well aware of the sleeping form curled next to him. He looked at her with adoration. The peace and calm on her sleeping face, the long deep draws of breath, he knew she was content. The little upturned smile upon her lips put one on his own. He wondered if that was a usual thing, the smile while sleeping, either way he liked to think that he had a cause in that.   
He gently tucked the hair that had fallen in her face behind her ear as he stared at her face. She was sleeping so deep that she didn’t even stir as his lips brushed hers. He laughed softly, recalling a few hours before how his fingers made her stir, and moan and cry out his name. The little flutter under her eyelids told him she was dreaming, and she muttered something incoherent as she turned and curled herself in the other direction. 

“Aye lass, you keep dreaming.” he whispered as he slipped out of bed. There was breakfast and his car to take care of before it was towed. He was grateful that Jason flagged his car as “do not tow” but knew he needed to move it soon. Elbereth, who was sleeping by Eowyn’s feet meowed as he passed and Sam shushed her, “I’ll be right back.” He scribbled those words on a piece of notepaper, in case she did wake. The last thing he wanted her to feel was any insecurity on his behalf. 

He found her keys next to what he presumed to be the urn of her once fiance’. He stared at it for a few moments, and his eyes drew upwards to the picture of the three smiling faces that now made sense to him. He had questions, yet he knew what he felt. 

“I promise to love her, man. With all I have got.” 

\---------

Eowyn woke slowly, a panic rising in her heart as she realized she was alone. She turned and found the note on the pillow, and the scent of bacon and coffee wafted into the bedroom and the panic eased. She stretched, found the t-shirt that she was wearing the night prior and followed her nose to appease her growling stomach.   
She smiled when she saw him, cooking over her half working stove, making them breakfast. 

“I guess I should have forewarned you that my stove is crap.” she said, heart fluttering. 

He jumped a bit, and returned her smile “Aye, but I’m making due! I was hoping to bring you some breakfast in bed, but you’re too quick!” 

A laugh escaped her lips and she felt a blush rise on her cheeks as she stood on her tip toes to kiss him, “That’s okay. Less crumbs to worry about.” She pulled some plates and mugs from the cabinets, then helped him finish the breakfast preparations, “You’re spoiling me.” As she looked at the fresh fruit, scones and clotted cream along with a fresh bouquet of wildflowers on the table. 

He laughed, “In my defense, I just pay good attention.” 

Eggs, bacon and fried potatoes joined the feast on the table. They sat ,books pushed to one side. He squeezed her knee as they began to eat in a comforting manner. “I bet you have questions.” she said as picked at her breakfast. 

“As many as you do for me.” 

She smiled, “Well… I suppose we should start.”


End file.
